Sista from Another VISTA

Today from afar I saw a large Middle Eastern family approaching the restaurant only an hour and a half before closing (and believe me, for a large Middle Eastern family that is NOT enough time), and I said, "Armando, LOOK!" and he looked up from chopping cucumbers and his face filled with terror and he said "Oh my God," and crossed himself and looked at the sky to the Blessed Virgin. But his prayers did us no good.

But otherwise he is a jolly Mexican man (he commutes from Tijuana every day, and shows me cellphone videos of his 3-year-old son Eduard), and later he stood at the grill singing, "Celebrate!" when he was making kabobs. Also today Armando and I stood behind the counter and ate freshly roasted eggplant with our hands, and it was wholesome and good.

Apparently if you're Muslim, it takes about 10 minutes to pray.

Duude, in Cambodia there is this 6-year-old boy and he has this 19-foot pet python, who came to live with the family when the boy was a baby and the python was only 20 inches long (apparently when you live in Cambodia, pythons just sometimes come and live with you for no reason, just because they feel like it, it's like they slither into your house and refuse to leave), and the boy says he loves the python like a sister (seriously), and the family feeds the python and bathes it and sometimes they even pray to it (the mother thinks it has brought good luck to the family), and there were all these pictures of the boy lying entwined in the python, or the boy riding the python as it glides regally through the household, or the boy giving the python a loving embrace. Seriously. I'm not making this shit up. Behold for yourself:

http://www.tiscali.nl/images/2/0/ORH2003052200114_dis_510.jpg
http://www.tiscali.nl/images/2/0/ORH2003052200120_dis_510.jpg

Whoa, sweet photographs.

Haaa, and on one website somebody from the Philippines commented, feed the snake regurlarly or else the snake will get the boy for snack.

But some animals are kind, and do not eat people, but we are cruel and do not return the favour, and we KILL them and then we're like, "Whoa, why did that bear kill us?" when obviously you cannot kill and then not BE killed at some point.
Haaa I was a ballistic vegan.

Also in South Carolina, there was this 6-foot alligator that somehow ended up standing on its hind legs at the front door of this nice upper-middle-class house and trying to ring the doorbell), and this guy took a picture of it. Seriously. It is fucked UP. Hell, if I heard someone ring my doorbell and came to the door and a 6-foot alligator was there, I would be like, "SHIIIIIIIIT!" and then I would slam the door as fast as I could, and lock it too. I would not have the presence of mind to take a picture.

I was explaining to Fatima how people think that Nada and I are the same. "Dude, we aren't even the same RACE," I said. "Yeah, she's a sista from another VISTA!" said Fatima. Haaa, I had never heard that expression before, but now I must use it when I have my black moments (and I will).

Wow. This is a long missive. That is because this morning before work I had no chance to refill my working stash from my main stash, and the main stash (the monstrous amount of Mexican Candy that I acquired) is wrapped in many layers of coverings and then doused in lotion so it is like a fragrant BOMB, and hidden in a particular place. So I was not able to work high today, but that was okay, because I renewed my spirit. And then I just smoked underneath our house (our house is built on a hill and we have this weird large space under the front patio) and watered my mother's hanging plant as well (She is out of town and I did not want to FAIL her), and the taste of weed after a whole day without was like a taste of sweet ambrosia, and it immediately fuelled this chronicle. I should roam the Internet and find bizarre news and animal photographs, and then shortly go to bed.
~High Sage