Hezbollah

Sometimes late at night when very high, I creep about the house like a spirit, so I do not disturb anyone.

Also, in addition to the email chronicles I also keep a written chronicle as always, because sometimes the written potbook is closer at hand, and this current potbook was only supposed to have 400 pages like the others but NO, I am on the 444th page and there are still pages left, and I cannot figure out how this miracle has occurred. At first I thought I had labelled the pages wrong while high, but that was not the case at all. So perhaps the notebook company made an error, and fucked up with my batch of notebooks, or perhaps it is like the story in the Old Testament about the prophet Elijah and the widow, where she takes Elijah in during a famine and her jar of oil and jar of flour never run empty from then on. That is how the pages of my potbook are, and it is a great thing. Also I need to buy a new one, and I haven't gotten around to that yet.

Today I went to smoke among some vegetation on the hill, and all around me were these bees that loved the red flowers in the vegetation. "I have not come to harm you, but to respect you," I said to the bees in my pothead philosopher voice, and the bees did not bother me or sting me at all, and I blew potsmoke onto them in gratitude. Hahaha.

Dude, my mom made me clean the bathrooms the other night, and I realized as I was cleaning the toilet that, when you put the lid and the seat down, you can see that the toilet is actually smiling slyly at you, like a wicked dolphin, or a crocodile. It is true. I showed it to my sister, and she agreed.

Also this morning when I first woke up, she looked at me and said, "Sister, what do you think about the afterlife? What do you believe about it?" and I was like, "Uh, I can't talk about those kinds of things when I'm first waking up," and it was true. My mind does not function on that level early in the morning. "Okay," she said, and went back to sleep, and I was kind of disturbed by that.

Also she sleeps topless which is stupid in our household because our parents I'm sure will accidentally walk in on her at some point, and be perturbed, so she constantly pulls the sheet up to her chin like an invalid in a tuberculosis ward. I told her that and we laughed, even though there is nothing funny about a tuberculosis ward, because we have terrible unholy senses of humor, and we love the sacreligious.

Also, in Siberia there are sheep, and beavers, and polar bears, and great reindeer. Also they have sweet seals.

Also, Hezbollah is a terrible warlike organization, but it is also a really fun word to say. And on the front page of USA Today one day when we were in the Phoenix airport on a layover last week, I saw a picture of this really old Lebanese broad waving two pistols in the air and shrieking with joy because she was really impressed with Hezbollah's deeds. And I thought, "That broad is crazy." And war is no cause to get all joyful like that.

I am kind of afraid of Amish people, clowns and mimes, owls, life-sized fruit and vegetable costumes (or any kind of food item costume, for that matter), and I am very creeped out by patriotic figures on stilts, or anyone on stilts for that matter. It is very strange.

And last night my sister and brother and I watched this CSI episode about this broad who had a fetish for sleeping with clowns, so that when her husband killed like the 50th clown she'd slept with after he walked in on them, she kept the clown suit and made her husband wear it, which is just outrageous and terrifying to me, and we were all like, "Uh, this is creepy." Our young virgin brother is learning a lot of strange things about sex from CSI, and sometimes I worry. Like, he and I saw this episode about these people who are obsessed with dressing as life-size animals and they exhibit the behaviours of those animals, and gather in conventions and have big raves and orgies. And then I found out that those people actually exist, and they had a recent convention in Pittsburgh of all places (of course it would be in Pittsburgh).



Haha, that is a great sheep. Once I was in England, and visited with some sheep, and it was great.
~Sage

1 Kings 17:
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
6.
7.
8. Then the word of the LORD came to Elijah, saying,
9. "Arise, go to Zarephath, which belongs to Sidon, and stay there; behold, I have commanded a widow there to provide for you."
10. So he arose and went to Zarephath, and when he came to the gate of the city, behold, a widow was there gathering sticks; and he called to her and said, "Please get me a little water in a jar, that I may drink."
11. As she was going to get it, he called to her and said, "Please bring me a piece of bread in your hand."
12. But she said, "As the LORD your God lives, I have no bread, only a handful of flour in the bowl and a little oil in the jar; and behold, I am gathering a few sticks that I may go in and prepare for me and my son, that we may eat it and die."
13. Then Elijah said to her, "Do not fear; go, do as you have said, but make me a little bread cake from it first and bring it out to me, and afterward you may make one for yourself and for your son.
14. "For thus says the LORD God of Israel, `The bowl of flour shall not be exhausted, nor shall the jar of oil be empty, until the day that the LORD sends rain on the face of the earth.' "
15. So she went and did according to the word of Elijah, and she and he and her household ate for many days.
16. The bowl of flour was not exhausted nor did the jar of oil become empty, according to the word of the LORD which He spoke through Elijah.

See, it is the story of Elijah and the widow.