The Coyotes

The Internet is being so deviant tonight. It is really disobedient to my will.

I just smoked outside in the night, and I saw these coyotes trotting up into the hills carrying things in their mouths, and they looked just like joyful medium-sized dogs, and I thought, "Uh, let's just be friends here," and I did not display threatening behaviour to them, and they went on their merry way. They have made paths in the hills, so as a gesture of kindness I thanked them for making those paths, which I use as well.

Dude, check it out:
www.impeachbush.org
It is true. Last week at work there was this older guy who had that website on his shirt, and I was like, "Whoa, that is a sweet shirt," and he directed me to this site.

Haha, the other day after work I was sitting in the car in the parking lot while my mother was buying dinner, and I witnessed two old people drive completely over a concrete curb. They looked confused, and just kept driving. "These people are crazy," I thought. Some old people just wreak terrible havoc on the road.

"Do you feel RESTORED?" I said to Mahmoud when he returned from his Friday prayers in the afternoon. "Yes, I do," he said.

The old white people two doors down have this American flag on their front door like a warning. And next to them are the 40-year-old lesbians, and on the other side are the Russian broads (but they are not lesbians; they are two middle-aged sisters and a 20-year-old daughter). The older Russian broad has a hearty laugh. Russians are often hearty broads in general. And then there are two middle-aged but well-preserved gay men across the street, and they sometimes walk around the front of their house carrying potted plants and deciding where to put them. Often early in the morning they have seen the coyotes as well.

And a couple of weeks ago I said, "Mom, I had a dream that one of the men next door was black" (which was true), and my mom said, "Carissa, one of them IS black," and I was taken aback, because I had only met one of them (and he was white), and they are cousins, so I was confused.

Dude, on the dumpster behind our apartment was a sticker that said "BUSH KNEW," and I noticed it every time I took out the trash.

And once I was driving with the Jens when we saw a bumper sticker that said, "IF YOU CAN READ THIS, YOU'RE NOT GEORGE BUSH," and we loved it, and howled with laughter, because it was so close to the truth.

But I usually do not try to think about that man when high, because it disturbs my peace, and raises my blood pressure.

I hate it when I accidentally eat the sticker on the fruit. That happens a lot more often that it should.

"Mel Gibson," I said in a rebukeful voice to the television, when news of his DUI appeared. "What?" said my mom.

And I refuse to ever watch The Passion of the Christ, even though my family owns it. All the movies that my family owns are about either race or religion or both, and it is not a very great selection. And then there is a large collection of Three Stooges DVD's, but I despise that show, because it is not funny.

Moshi is a great golden dog, with compassionate eyes.

And Motor is danceful, and pranceful. Sometimes in my room, she used to look at me with a creepy Mother Mary look, and an fixed stare.

Once at the end of the other Jen's party, Jen called all the dogs to her so they could surround her and keep her company while she was ill in the backyard. The versions of this story are disputed, though, because people had been drinking, and it was very late.

Today Ramin said, 'It's all about the benjamins," but I thought he said, "It's all about the vengeance," and I said, "VENGEANCE?" and he said, "What the hell is that?"

That is all.